Feminine Mysteries

REMEMBERING. HONORING. BODIES, CYCLES, BLOOD.

I was deep into our second yoga nidra session of a 3-day workshop in 2019 when, behind my closed eyes, I was taken to a scene a few months after the birth of my son two years prior. The immensity of the emotional pain, grief, and complete overwhelm of matrescence flooded my system. I had almost forgotten its paralyzing potency.

And while the tears began to fall from the desperate hollowness of that time, I also felt surrounded by the softest yet strongest force I have ever experienced. The word LOVE barely approaches the full power of that emotional presence, but I knew then that everything I had ever experienced had led to that moment and it was by design. It was beautiful.

THERE WAS NO DISSONANCE BETWEEN THE PAIN AND THE LOVE; THEY WERE BOTH PERFECT AND PART OF THE SAME CURRENT.

My entire being pulsated in gratitude. Words like grace and blessing drifted through my consciousness...so much was felt that couldn't be articulated.

That day was also the first day of my menstrual cycle bleed - a time that historically had been physically and emotionally painful. However, in one moment, that was all dissolved in near ecstasy and I knew there was Wisdom we have forgotten. Wisdom through the celebration of rites of passage: our own birth, naming, menarche, union, pregnancy, our child's birth, motherhood, (peri)menopause, croning and death. Wisdom in understanding our own bodies.

I knew we needed to return to the wisdom and beauty of our bodies and how they connect to the seen and unseen, to the cycles of plants and stars, to creation and destruction...

But the first step would be to heal the deeply embedded ancestral pain and wounding that has disconnected us for thousands of years - the wounding that says our bodies are dirty, ugly, and wrong. At best, an inconvenience. And so I began (and continue on) my own journey of excavation and reconnection, re-weaving histories, causes and effects. It is at times an arduous journey, but it's one that is ultimately meant to be taken in community.....in moments of solemn reflection, breathless wonder, and raucous, joyous gratitude for this mysterious life that we live.

OUR BODIES ARE SACRED.

And so I began (and continue on) my own journey of excavation and reconnection, re-weaving histories, causes and effects. It is at times an arduous journey, but it's one that is ultimately meant to be taken in community.....in moments of solemn reflection, breathless wonder, and raucous, joyous gratitude for this mysterious life that we live.

This desire for healing led me down various paths such as Reiki I, II, III Certification and The Way of the Seabhean training. (pinned ROOTS post) It seems my path is becoming a synthesis of sorts, as my own Self's modality begins to take form as ENERGY WEAVING emerges through me. (also pinned post) I look forward to seeing what else the path has to share.